Posted by: purpleandrew | October 20, 2010

Autumn’s Siren Song

Well, I’m wondering what is going on.

Like a sunrise, there is a growing vibe inside my head. It is a good vibe. It is the home straight and I’m on it.

It is coming up to cycle 6.  The final chemo shot; the end of the line for the voluntary intake of poison and the platform from which all things will spring for the future.

I’m on the brink again.

The brink, now there is a verdant place to be. So many choices are available all we have to do is choose to take them.

Notice if you will, that I am not limiting us to only one. Nah, why just take one when there are so many available?

I woke up yesterday, after a reasonable sleep, (yes I am noticing a pattern here) and outside the sun was high in the sky and it was bright and crisp and fresh. It just seemed that the whole season was shouting its presence with great joy and abandon.

A little glow began to grow in my heart as I heard the Siren Song of Autumn and began to dance a little bit in my Soul.

I did a little bit of sewing and it worked out really well. The day before I had made the first loaves of bread since just after the surgery, all very small things but each day has been a little triumph of oomph!

I kind of mislaid my oomph just for a while there. I put it on the back burner to concentrate on this getting better thing. It stayed there and I forgot all about it.

Getting better is much easier with a bit of oomph behind it for sure.

I’m sitting here writing this and there is a bubble of a giggle just permeating through, oh there it is, excuse me while I wallow in this for a minute or two…

You see, wallowing can be a good thing. Now I have an endorphin thing going on its all good.

Time has folded in on itself and if I try to think of how long ago it was that I had the diagnosis, or even how long it was from the time I knew there was a problem it seems all at once ancient and current. The one thing that is clear is the knowing that then was the expectation of what is happening now. After all what is time but a concept of state?

This is what I decided I would be feeling at this time. This is how I wanted it to be.

Now I have what I wanted and now I want what I have.

So I’m listening to and feeling autumn’s Siren song, it is familiar and you know I might just know the words so I will sing a little too. Then I might even get my boogie shoes on and dance about a bit just to see how it fits.

Who knows where that might lead?

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Responses

  1. Let’s hope it leads…KNOW – where… 😉 xx

  2. If willpower has aything to do with it, there is no doubt your going to be a winner. see you soon and lets boogie all down together xxx wee sis

  3. Dear Leslie, you don’t know me, but I have heard your name so many times during last week’s course with Andrew that I feel I know you a little bit by now and I just wanted to let you know that I wish you all the very best for your future plans with the RV. I am sending you lots of positive thoughts and strength for your journey together. Lots of love. Markus


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